My stories
I'm telling a bit of my life story in this blog.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Create Your Own
Mi hermano, el medico,
Elemental sencillo,
Se compro en Coconucos un rancho de ilusion
Esta parado sobre un temblor de guaduas,
En el blancor estraño que solo da la cal
Su puerta y sus ventanas por las que apenas cabe la luz de la mañana,
Las vigila en silencio
Un cerro majestuoso
Que se quedo parado cuando paso corriendo
La cordillera immensa
Huyendole al diluvio y a la mano de Dios
El rancho de mi hermano,
Elemental, sencillo
Como su corazon
Se rie de los palacios porque se siente rico
De frisos y cornisas
Cuando cada mañana lo dora con sus rayos la plenitud del sol...
--------------------------------
MY BROTHER'S RANCH
My brother the doctor
Elemental and simple,
He bought in Coconucos a ranch of illusions
Built on bamboos,
It is white as chalk
While the morning light
Comes through its door and windows
It's looked after by a magestic hill,
Left standing when the immense mountains
Ran away from the deluge and the hand of God
My brother's ranch
Elemental and simple like his heart
Is full of corners and flowers
Tanned by the sun and age
Rich and full of enchantment
Visit My Website
Sunday, June 18, 2006
No one knows what lies outside the universe. I guess is some other universes and they all float inside a mega universe, containing all of this little universes. They drift around forming clusters of universes, and from time to time these island universes will collide with each other, making a tremendous bang and disappearing in a flash of unknown particles. I wonder if anyone can ever fly in a rocket in between universes and if time exists at all in this strange space. Perhaps they will look like stars to the eyes of our intrepid traveller. Every universe must have a mega black hole in its midst and some universes are made of antimatter.
All of these universes have to be contained into something, and then we have different blobs full of universes floating in their own time continuum.
I can go on and on. I wonder if we'll ever know where we really are or what is the purpose of us all.
SPACE AND TIME
Within space and time
Galaxies float in ether
Shinning across the aeons
And thrashing in a soup of gas
Magnificent nebulas scatter around
Crawling across the distances
As hazy bands of infinity
While stars erupt in a sea of protons
Red giants envelop solar systems
Their pregnant bellies scattering particles
As rings of gas expand forever
Life is born from their seeds
Beyond the universe’s infinite bounds
Another one exists
Galaxies fill an alien sky
Ringed planets go around hot suns
A replica of me stares at the heavens
Anti matter eyes rejoicing in the spectacle
Of milliards of suns
In a soup of gas and dust
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Wednesday, June 14, 2006
VITAL MISTAKE
Cryoguy wakes up n
In the distant future
Full of horror
He tries to understand
What has happened
To his world
Why it has turned
Upside down
While the date has gone tipsy
People are new
And talking funny
Full of witty ideas
Never imagined in his poor
Aged and whimsy brain
Caught by error
In a time full of eddies
And echoes of a distant past
He was put by mistake
In a freezer
At the time of his death
By an immortalist
And has to live forever
With this fringe group
He always hated
Saturday, June 10, 2006
TALKING CRYONICS
Did you ever want to go to the future after your own death?
Cryonics is thought to be science fiction by some people. Imagine yourself five hundred years from now, in a very different world. Cars will fly in cities where the streets have been turned into immense parks. Money might have finished and no one will ever die again.
You will live for as long as you want to, and when you’re tired of life, you will be placed in a tank for a few hundred years.
We all have to die at the moment. No one is safe from death. Whether you’re young or old, poor or rich, black or white, intelligent or dumb, you have to die.
I don’t want to decompose in a coffin or to be burned to cinders. Cryonics might take me to that future where death has been vanquished. If I don’t wake up at all and cryonics fails, I'll stay dead. Just like the rest of you.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
FEAR
I wonder how it must feel
To look at the world for a last time
Before you’re all alone
In front of fear
As you shut your eyes
And float towards the abyss
What will your last thoughts be
Imagine oblivion
Drifting towards nonexistence
And seeing nothing
As you move into the void
emptiness greets you
At that moment
When you stop being yourself
And fall into the universe
Called death
Sunday, June 04, 2006
CRYO 231
Cryo231 has woken up
From his long sleep
Someone put him
In a cryonics tank
Many centuries ago
And has been cruising around the stars
In a rocket built to last
With the durability
Of the quantum world
Accompanied by his crew
Frozen in other tanks
Cryo 231 doesn’t know
How old he is
Or what he has to do
Light years away from home
With a body cloned
Out of a few cells
And a very old brain
Friday, May 19, 2006
A DREAM
A calm sea shines under a full moon
Showing the view
Of a peaceful beach
Amidst utopia
As a wave hurtles
Towards the shore
Threatening to engulf me
Into chaos
I wish it to stop
And it’s Motionless in an instant
Weird in my vision
I can’t be sure whether it’s reality
Or if it exists alongside my fears
I’m thankful for this gift of freezing time
To save my life
Lost in the cosmos
Then consciousness throws me
Towards reality
While the morning sun
Awakes my senses
As I open my eyes
I remember that frozen second
Of eternity
Thrown into uncertainty
Monday, May 08, 2006
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY
It's a beautiful day here in London
Geese swim in the pond
And as sunshine fills my soul
The trees sway in the gentle breeze
Of a summer world
Enjoying the power of life
The mother duck
Feeds her ducklings
In the middle of utopia
While big fish
Swim below her feet
Rejoicing in nature
Giving us universal hope
And happiness
Because beauty
Engenders pleasure
In a perfect universe
Without any rain
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Monday, April 17, 2006
JESUS, THE CRYONICIST
He prayed
And performed miracles
His mission had been a simple one
To save the mortal man
As he cured the sick
And raised the dead from their graves
He was a king without a crown
Whose purpose
Became his goal
Man of wisdom
King of us all
Who had a simple plan
He taught us a lesson
With his unfair demise
Up on the hill
In a metal tank
At the hands of his friends
Whom he had come to save
From going back to the earth
As nature intended
Three days after his death
He arose again
From his cold container
In glorious triumph
This son of a carpenter
Came back from death
As a feat of science
In a Cryonics way
Happy Cryonics Easter
Monday, April 03, 2006
SAVING HENRY
Henry is a dummy
With plastic skin
And placid eyes
At five thirty he died
By five thirty one
He was lifted onto the ice bath
We didn’t want to send him
To dummy heaven
If it ever existed
We did compressions
Put his head in ice
And an IV line in his arm
Medications went in
Flowing through his blood
And stopped free radicals
Ice bags around his body
Kept the temperature down
While oxygen
Went into his lungs
Saving the brain
Keeping grey matter fresh
SURVEY
What do you want to happen to your body after you die?
1: Do you want to be cremated?
2: Do you want to be buried?
3: Do you want to be frozen?
You must explain why you are doing it.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
My father died ten years ago. As a cryonicist,I haven't recovered from that terrible tragedy yet. I have lost my father twice as far as I'm concerned. First to death itself, and then to the tomb.
HE'S GONE FOREVER!
IN MEMORY OF DAD
I have memories of you
Happy events of my childhood
Shrouded in fog
Dimmed by the years
As I remember you
I dissolve in tears
A proud man
Has been reduced to dust
What lies under the mud
It’s not my dad
He’s gone forever
And only lives in my mind
Sunday, February 19, 2006
DEATH
I have ran away
Through the infinite sea
From your realm of darkness
With you in pursuit
I believed you once
Now I want revenge
For the rising pain
And my failed emotions
You promised me eternal love
On the tombstone of life
With a false emerald ring
And a coffin full of harm
I’ve flown through time
While you chased me
Hot tears of emotions
Running down my face
I trusted you long ago
Now I want my freedom
Your kingdom of darkness
Has to end for my soul
Your time has come
I don’t love you at all
Let me be on my own
Far from your world
Thursday, February 02, 2006
IMMORTALITY
I dreamt of immortality
As a tiny child
Scared of death
Loving life
My wish not to die
Took me away
To many corners
Of the world
The thought of death
Drew me towards science
Endless deities
Calling for my soul
I wished to be
A common god
Living in heaven
Forever and ever
Of the immortal beings
Inhabiting legends
I envied their longevity
And exciting lives
You might wonder
Whether not dying
Has been a dream
For a fleeting soul
I’ve found a solution
To my love of life
And peace of mind
For my poor heart
Freeze my body
Keep it fresh
It won’t decay
Within a tank
Through the eons
Time might find me
Undying eyes
Looking at the world
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Saturday, January 28, 2006
A FAREWELL
One day
When I reach life's end
I’ll have this to say
To anyone who cares
This is a farewell to you all
Beyond me lies eternity
And after that
Who knows?
The journey should be hard
Nothing is easy
And this is a send-off
To all the world
My body will float in coldness
Organs won’t decay
Soul won’t sink
Brain will remain
This ship won’t flounder
It might reach eternity
While the rest is history
I will live on
Farewell cruel world
Hello distant future
Beyond the port of death
I’ll come back to existence
Friday, January 27, 2006
ODE TO CRYONICS
I want to see the future
Rolling down the ages
And nurturing the universe
Along with my dreams
Let me awaken
In a new millennium
When thoughts of death
Belong to the past
I might stand here
In a few hundred years
Memories of a past life
In my new brain
Hurrah to cryonics
Thumbs up for immortality
Living forever rules
Death is my foe
It was a magical moment
Orion shone above me
As the Milky Way
Sprawled across the sky
Three red lights appeared
By Orion’s side
Dancing around
At incredible speeds
The world stopped turning
As they marched about
Faster than a jet plane
Stranger than my dreams
Then these lights
After several moments
Disappeared into infinity
Awakening reality
Don’t ask me what they were
It challenges my mind
They swept into the sky
Stumbling on my world
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
DAPHNE
Running down the path
Hair flying in the wind
Daphne looks back
Someone is chasing her
She rushes by a pond
Splashing in the mud
And flies by the trees
Crouching under a bush
As she hugs the branches
Spreading leaves around
Feet sink in mud
Reaching down to infinity
The stranger arrives
Disturbing the calm
Kicking the earth
Searching for her
Quiet within the bush
She looks at him
Leaves caressing her face
Body buried in mud
Her skin hardens
Branches grow out of hair
She communions with earth
As he kisses the leaves
Thursday, December 29, 2005
SPACE AND TIME
Within space and time
Galaxies float in ether
shining across the eons
And thrashing in a soup of gas
Magnificent nebulas scatter around
Crawling across the distances
As hazy bands of infinity
While stars erupt in a sea of protons
Red giants envelop solar systems
Their pregnant bellies scattering atomic particles
As rings of gas expand forever
Life is born from their seeds
Beyond the universe's infinite bounds
Another one exists
Galaxies fill an alien sky
Ringed planets go around hot suns
A replica of me stares at the heavens
Anti matter eyes rejoicing in the spectacle
Of milliards of suns
In a soup of gas and dust
SWEET MEMORIES
Yesterday you lived here
Small boots kicked in the snow
Nose running in a pink face
Unruly hair and a mouth pouting,
Kiss? You asked
You rushed out of the nursery
I Pecked your cold cheeks
Colourful drawings still fresh
Pack lunches with banana peelings
Little feet chasing me home
Sesame Street came on
We lay in bed entwined
Sweet memories, lost forever?
Your coat hangs in the corridor
Boots sleep amongst the dust
Happy pictures look at me
From the depths of pain
If I could bring back the past
And have you at home
So many things to tell
All waiting to come out
Perhaps I imagined you
In between sweet dreams
Where little feet chased me
Until they ran out of time
My mind sees you sometimes
From despair comes hope
And everything ends as fantasy
You were never born
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
The Britons dying to get into the human deep freeze
by JANE FRYER, Daily Mail - More by this author » Last updated at 11:55am on 29th July 2006The grainy video diary shows a bright sunny day in January and a beaming 60-year-old woman clutching her two grandchildren tightly to her chest.
She is terminally ill and she knows it, but still she smiles — eyes sparkling and full of hope — as she chatters away to the camera about the future.
'I want to live for ever and I'm going to. I just love life. I stopped worrying about death knowing I'd taken a pro-active step.'
Anita Riskin has no intention of dying. She's merely taking a 'break' between life cycles. When Anita took her last breath several weeks later — on February 2 this year — there was no autopsy, no embalming and no hearse. Instead, the team of volunteer body-freezers, who were already jostling for space at her deathbed, took over.
They packed her still warm body in ice, before loading her into her 'ambulance to the future' — a specially-adapted white van — and raced the 390 miles from her home in California to Alcor Life Extension Foundation in Scottsdale, Arizona.
Within hours, her chest was sliced open, her blood flushed out and replaced with a biological antifreeze, a hole drilled through her skull, probes inserted in her brain and her body temperature reduced to minus 196C. Next, her corpse was zipped into a sleeping bag and lowered head first into a 9ft communal thermos tank of liquid nitrogen, alongside a couple of other bodies, several dismembered heads and a pet or two.
This is not sci-fi; it's real life. Or, more appropriately, death. Not that Alcor members believe this is the end. They prefer to call it 'mostly death — after all, we're all intending to come back'.
Anita was among those who have placed their faith in cryonics (the word derives from cryogenics, meaning the physics of extreme cold). She was convinced that, if she was frozen carefully and quickly soon after her death, her body could be maintained indefinitely until science found a cure for the ovarian cancer that claimed her life.
When that time comes, she hoped that future generations would be able to take her out of cryogenic suspension, thaw her out, jump-start her brain, restore her memory and repair the damage the Alcor team inflicted as they prepared her body to be frozen.
She was so captivated by cryonics that she agreed to have her final days and the freezing process filmed for TV to 'spread the good word'. It is tempting to dismiss Anita as an American eccentric, but she is not alone.
Together, Alcor and its Michigan-based competitor the Cryonics Institute have more than 1,000 members signed up for resurrection — scores of whom are British — plus hundreds of corpses frozen in communal steel tanks. The companies prefer to call these 'patients'. So, who would be willing to go through with it?
At first sight, Chrissie de Rivaz, 66, from Cornwall, is an ordinary, down-to-earth, jolly, blonde mother of three.
Until you catch a glimpse of the silver bracelet jangling on her wrist, engraved with the message: 'Reward. Whole body donor. If dead, push 40,000 international units heparin intravenous (an anti-blood-clotting agent) and do cardio-pulmonary resuscitation while cooling with ice. Do not freeze, autopsy or embalm. Contact numbers on the back.'
This is the passport to immortality that the retired teacher, her husband, John, and 65 other Britons wear at all times. In the event of sudden death, the numbers on their bracelets will contact a 'mobile salvaging' team of cryonicists who will race to the member in a white van, complete with ice, a cooling mechanism and a heart and lung machine which they will use to start pumping glycerine into the body.
'It's a basic plumbing job,' says funeral director Barry Albin, 55, from Rotherhithe, East London. He is the sole European agent for the Cryonics Institute and, over the past decade, has helped freeze one Briton and five other Europeans.
'You use heparin to thin the blood, take out the oxygenated waste material and put in a kind of antifreeze/glycerine solution in its place, before arranging for the bodies to be shipped to the States.
Mr Freeze
'They call me Mr Freeze, but I see myself as Mr Freedom-of-Choice. But it's not for me. After all, how could you ever reconstitute a soul? I'm going to be buried.'
It is more than 40 years since an American physics teacher called Robert Ettinger, inspired by early science fiction writers, began the cryonics movement by writing a highly controversial book, The Prospect Of Immortality, which predicted that death might be reversible.
The 1964 thesis sparked such acclaim and outrage that the U.S. authorities feared thousands would opt to be frozen in time.
But cryonics did not take off. Partly, perhaps, because most people don't believe it could work. Or, possibly, because it's a lot more expensive than a traditional funeral.
Alcor charges UK members £90,000 for whole body cryopreservation and offers a reduced rate of £60,000 for neurosuspension (preservation of just your dismembered head).
Members can also have their pet frozen alongside them, which is priced according to size.
Most fund their immortality though a monthly insurance premium, ranging from £20 to £100 a month.
Alan Sinclair, 68, a retired nursing home manager from West Sussex — who first heard of cryonics when he saw it discussed on television many years ago — pays £20 a week. 'I pay a bit more because I signed up relatively late in life, but it's still cheaper than smoking, and better for you. It's a small price for a second life,' he says.
'To me, it's the most sensible thing in the world, and there's good scientific reason why it should work. I can't understand why thousands of people haven't signed up.'
His only trepidation is what it will be like to wake up in the American cryonics facility, where his body will be held in suspension.
'I'm not a big traveller — I've only ever been to France, once, and I was rather homesick, so it'll be a bit of a shock to wake up in Arizona.'
Despite the extra cost, he and his wife Sylvia, 58, found the decision to have Alan's whole body frozen — rather than just his head — easy.
'I just think I'd feel more comfortable staying in one piece,' he explains. 'I know it's logical, and that our entire being is in the head, but I can't help feeling that neurosuspension is just the tiniest bit barmy.'
Others, however, place unquestioning faith in the technology of the future. The Camacho family from London — mother Maria, 52, and three children — are on target to pay a total of £280,000 for a stint in the deep freeze with their four cats, Mitzy, Jasper, Lucy and Elsa.
Maria is a 'head only' — believing that by the time she is reanimated, technology will be such that scientists will simply fit her with a new, beautiful body.
Insane? Perhaps. But another head-only cryonicist is Dr Aubrey de Grey, a biomedical geronologist (he studies the aging process) at Cambridge University. Although a colourful figure with his long, flowing beard, he is also soft-voiced, charming and sounds alarmingly rational.
'I think the procedure has a fair chance of working and a second life cycle in a long time sounds a lot of fun to me. After all, what is there to lose?
'I can't help feeling, though, that with any medical procedure, the first few revived will be experimental, and they [scientists of the future] are unlikely to start on the neurosuspensions until they've developed a method by trial and error on the whole bodies. I think it's money well-spent.'
Realistically, could it work? We do, after all, live in an era of frozen sperm, regenerated kidneys and designer babies. Not long ago, heart transplants were the stuff of sci-fi.
'Waste of money'
Dr Arthur Rowe, the governor of the Society of Cryobiology and a professor of forensic medicine, has spent the last decade researching the subject. He has concluded patients are wasting their money. 'What bothers me is that many of these cryonics people give bereaved parents and spouses a false sense of security,' he says.
'It takes advantage of their vulnerability. There is no scientific evidence that patients will ever stand a chance of being brought back.'
Others have likened the technology needed to reanimate a cryonics patient to the process of trying to turn a hamburger back into a cow.
Particularly startling is that none of the Alcor volunteers is medically trained — not even Tanya Jones, who helps deep freeze the bodies. That hasn't stopped the firm from boasting that they are the 'world leader in cryonics, cryonics research and cryonics technology'.
So far, they have 74 bodies in tanks, even encouraging family and friends to visit and hug a corner of the tank where their loved one — or his or her dismembered head — is stored.
Body freezing is not an area in which to cut corners. Back in 1981, the cryonics community was rocked by scandal when tanks holding corpses at the Cryonics Society of California sprang leaks, which led to bodies thawing and decomposing.
A similar fate befell the bodies of Dr Raymond Martinot and his wife Monique Leroy. After spending 24 years in a specially-adapted stainless steel freezer unit in the vaulted cellar of their Loire Valley home, their son discovered to his horror last year that the fridge was faulty and his parents had started to thaw.
But suspend all scepticism for a moment. What if our future generations actually crack it and manage to reanimate these dead bodies, cure the diseases that killed them, fix all the damage caused by the antifreeze and make hay with the dismembered heads? What then for the 'second lifers'?
Even smiling Tanya has to admit there might be problems. 'Once they've revived, we'll have to deal with their serious psychological issues: how will they understand what happened while they were in the storage tank? What happened to the rest of their family? What are they going to do for a living?'
Chrissie and John de Rivaz have mulled this over carefully. 'I'll go on the chat show circuit and write meticulously researched historical novels set in the 20th and 21st centuries,' trills Chrissie.
John, however, is more practical. As well as their monthly insurance policy contributions, he regularly puts money into an overseas trust — there's no UK facility for saving money for use in future lives — to cover a rainy reanimation day.
Chrissie says their savings are minimal compared with what's going on in America, where members are reportedly putting away millions in 'personal revival trusts'.
Earlier this year, it was announced that Canadian electronics mogul Robert Miller was intending to place a 'substantial' portion of his £500million fortune in a trust for the day when he comes back from the dead. But even if we ignore the scientific and practical implausibilities of cryonics and future life, isn't the whole idea of meddling with death and life itself tantamount to playing God?
Chrissie de Rivaz has a ready answer: 'God gave us the gift of life and we're simply trying to preserve it. As far as I'm aware, he didn't set a limit on when we should die. It's just a natural sequence of events. Maybe it will work, maybe it won't, but you should never say never.'
Which is why today, nearly six months after her death, Anita Riskin — clearly labelled with a shiny tag that reads, 'First Life Cycle 22 April 1945 to 02 February, 2006' — lies head down in her stainless steel coffin, waiting with the 'mostly dead' for her second life to begin.
Death In The Deep Freeze is on Channel Five on Monday at 9pm.